My prayer life stinks!!!! This is not a new discovery, but it is a new annoyance. Since graduating college my prayer life has been on a slow down hill stroll (stroll is not the best word, but I can't think of how else to describe my growing lack of communication with the Lord). I have personally acknowledged this to the Lord and several friends, but each time I try to make changes they don't seem to last. There is always the excuse of being busy, but really I am not all that busy especially since you can talk to God any time you want. There is the excuse of being tired, which is true, but I am not tired 24 hours a day. There is the excuse of my inability to focus, which will only change if I start a routine forcing me to focus (like praying). There is the excuse of being lazy, oh wait that is not an excuse that is the truth. I am and have been struggling with laziness in my prayer life, and if I am honest in all areas of my walk with the Lord. Fortunately, now more than ever, my inconsistent, borderline absent (at least in my mind) prayer life is screaming, "BE CONSISTENT! BE CONTINUOUS!" I know what a consistent prayer life looks like, because I used to have one and I used to strive for it to be continual. However, those were during the good ol' college days. It was easy to intercede for others while walking to class. It was easy to worship the Lord when I spent no less than 5 hours a week participating in some Christian event with hundreds of other Christians. It was easy to daily be in the Word and praying when I lived with 4 other girls who were doing the same thing. It was easy to express thanks when my most stressful day was an Anatomy test or an argument with one of my roommates (btw, college really is soooooooooooo awesome). But when I look back I have to ask myself was it really all that easy or did I take the time to develop a discipline? After much thought, I realize I had developed a discipline. I was passionate about the Lord and I truly believed I could know Him more and that He would change people/situations through prayer. Somewhere along the way I allowed my passion to lessen and lessen and lessen (I know when passion began to fade, but I'll save that for another blog).
So what now? How do I re-focus? How do I ignite passion for the Lord, I once held so dear? How do I return to the discipline of prayer? I am going to start by re-reading "Too Busy Not to Pray" by Bill Hybels. I read this book in college and it helped to transform my prayer life. I am also going to use the time I am awake in the middle of the night, with my sweet little cranky pants, to pray.
I believe this the beginning of so many great things to come...................I'll keep you posted. In the mean time, you can pray for my prayer life!!!