Monday, May 9, 2011

Multitude Monday L

With each passing day the act of thanksgiving grew more difficult.  How do you give thanks in the midst of pain?  How do you give thanks when you are frustrated?  How do you give thanks when you believe one, whom you dearly love, is being neglected?  How do you give thanks when you are saying good bye to a life that you are not prepared to say good bye to?  

This week has been a true struggle to choose gratitude over anger, but God is working in me.  I can sense it during the most difficult times.  During the times when I am most overcome with frustration, but I can still look up and ask, "Help me to find the gift in this?"

I am thankful:

May 2, 2011

2429.  for news that my granny B is pain free
2430.  for a leisure jog with B this morning
2431.  that one day there will be no more suffering
2432.  that my parents went home to see my granny H and granny B

May 3, 2011

2433.  for hearing the words "I love you," every day for the last three years
2434.  for all the ways marriage has changed S and I
2435.  for the inability to fathom loving someone more

May 4, 2011

2436.  that God is exposing the pride in me
2437.  for my granny teaching me to sew
2438.  for my granny caring for papaw for many years, so he could be at home
2439.  that my dad was eating with 2 of his brother tonight
2440.  that one day there will be no more pain

May 5, 2011

2441.  for running against the wind and how the struggle helps me relieve frustration
2442.  for moments of distraction from the heart wrenching reality of my granny's suffering
2443.  for hospitals
2444.  for medical knowledge

May 6, 2011

2445.  that my son has a father who deeply cares about his character
2446.  for Samber team work while preparing Derby pies
2447.  for using our first harvest of bush beans (out of our garden) in stir-fry tonight

May 7, 2011

2448.  the LAUGHter the twins brought to me during the Mother's Day Tea
2449.  for room at the table with Anna, Casey, and Beckie
2450.  for a long, wonderful Derby celebration with friends that I truly enjoy spending time with 

May 8, 2011

2451.  to be a mom to my little boy
2452.  for being able to be transparent and vulnerable with my husband
2453.  for praying with my husband during this time of grief


Casey Martinez said...

Amber, am I reading this right that you have lost your parents and Grandma recently? I am not sure if I got that correctly or not so I hesitate to even say what my heart wants to say if it is true. Regardless, whatever grief you are experiencing my heart does break for you. Loss is SO hard especially when it is unexpected. My husband's father passed away a couple years ago three days before Christmas...only 43 years old and healthy. It has been a long and painful road of grieving especially for my husband...a couple years. I will be praying more specifically for you. God knows what you need better than anyone and I pray that no matter what you are feeling that he meets you excactly where you are at and loves on you in His perfect way. Can I help in any other way??

Kay K said...

I know this must be hard on you as both grandmothers are sick.
Please know that I am praying for both families.
There are those days that its just hard to be thankful and then in the mist of our being in the "Mully grubs" ...GOD's moves in our lives and gives us peace and comfort.He says its ok I am here and I love you ...............

Carolina said...

I am really sorry to hear about your grandmother. She sure was a wonderful woman and had such a great impact in your life! Will keep her and your family in my prayers this week.

Charlie and Rachel said...

My favorite is 2452 this week.

Thanks, Amber!

Rebecca B said...

Amber, I will be praying for your family this week. So sorry to hear about your grandmother.

Deborah said...

Praying for your grandmothers. Thanks for being a wonderful inspiration. I also love 2452.